The disaster unfolded slowly. More precisely, over the course of one-and-a-half years. I had decided then to take the path of least resistance. I would rinse out my teapot over the water fountain outside of my room instead of walking to the sink with the InSinkErator® garbage disposal in the kitchen. For 18 months I did this once a day, and for 18 months I had 0 monthly problems. On the 19th month, the fountain clogged. Resistance transferred from my pot to the fountain.
A soup of spent leaves and diluted tea sat there for two days. On the third day, two men from facilities came to fix the clog. If you do the math, that comes out to one man per 9 months of tea dumping, about enough time to carry a child. Alternatively, it comes out to two thirds of a man per day of clog. Two thirds of a day is more than enough time to carry a child - from the water fountain to the sink with the InSinkErator® garbage disposal in the kitchen. The InSinkErator® works by grinding and shredding solid food waste, using centrifugal force.
My father enjoys telling this story about incinerators. It has to do with balancing chemical equations. There used to be a day for burning waste in the Bronx. And, like clockwork, when that day came around it was always succeeded by a sore throat. The amount of waste burned in incinerators has generally leveled off since the 1990s. Smoke moves from the center to the periphery.
In the ninth month, the baby moves from the center to the periphery. A baby is two thirds of a man, if you think about it. If you do the math, that comes out to 2 men per every 3 babies. We also know that there are approximately 2.2 babies per adult woman. This comes out to 1.36 repeating adult women per every 3 babies, or 1.2 repeating men per adult woman. This exemplifies the first rule of parenting, which is to be consistent.
The first rule of urban planning on the other hand is “people first”. This isn’t to be confused with “first peoples,” which is another word for indigenous. “First peoples” can also refer to parents, because they were here first. Parents are repeating men. The InSinkErator® was first opened, and then it was clogged, like clockwork. This balances the chemical equation.
Urban planners balance the people and sprawl. The people come first. The sprawl, on the other hand, comes after 9 months. After 18 months, two repeating men came to see the smoke sprawling out from the smokestacks. The men advised placing smokestacks far away, because the smoke transfers resistance to the lungs. Lungs are two thirds of a person, if you think about it. If you do the math, this makes for one lung per baby. This, unfortunately, is the rule.
The first rule of urban planning is to avoid placing residential buildings near the InSinkErator®. In 2006, In-Sink-Erator removed the hyphens from its name. Secondly, one can remove hyphens between buildings with urban sprawl. InSinkErator® redesigned the company logo and released a re-engineered line of high technology disposers branded as the Evolution Series. On the third day he rose again, as in the new testament. The New Testament is an evolution series of high technology.
The first person enjoys telling this story about urban sprawl. The story has a point, and the point is repeating. The first person told me that the New Testament is urban. Parenting unfolded slowly which, fortunately, is the rule. The third rule of urban planning is that the disaster happens slowly. On the 19th month, he clogged again.
First, however, a soup of spent people came to fix the clog, like clockwork. The clock came to clog the work, which was grinding and shredding solid food waste. Chemical equations moved from the center to the periphery, using centrifugal force.
When urban sprawl walks to the incinerator it sinks, due to the consistency.
But, on the third day, like clockwork, it rises again